March

Charisma vs. Facts: Learn to See People’s True Nature to Avoid Falling Victim to Scammers

We often let the wrong people into our lives and businesses by relying on intuition and a candidate's personal charm. Why does this happen, how should you properly vet someone, and where is the line between sensible caution and paranoia?

The primary reason we misjudge people is simple: laziness. We fail to conduct checks from the very beginning. Often, we are enchanted by a person, short on time, or simply feel awkward digging into the past of someone who appears perfectly normal. "What reason is there to distrust them?" we think, relying on gut feeling.

However, intuition is a poor counselor here. There is a principle: professional scammers always look the most convincing, simply because that is how they make their living.

Whether building a business partnership or a friendship, a procedure known in the corporate world as due diligence is essential. In hiring, it is standard practice to find out what happened at previous jobs, what the results were, and why the person left.

The Cost of an Unvetted Employee

I encountered a phenomenal case in my own practice. We hired someone for a large manufacturing company, and shortly after, items began disappearing from the employees' locker rooms. I asked the HR department if they had checked previous workplaces or called former managers. It turned out they hadn't, even though it is a standard procedure.

I insisted they do it retroactively. When they called the former employers of this "young, energetic, and promising" employee, it turned out he worked reasonably well, but items had gone missing at that company too. Once he resigned, the thefts stopped. The puzzle was solved.

Markers of True Nature

To understand a person’s true nature, ethical level, and goals, I have developed a rule: observe how they manage resources over which they have complete freedom—energy, time, and money. How do they act when not restricted by social boundaries?

Free Time and Money. What do they spend them on? Do they pursue sports and self-development, or do they spend their nights in clubs and casinos?
Attitude Toward Promises. If you are facing an educated, athletic individual with a trail of unfulfilled promises and unpaid debts, there is no reason to believe they will treat you any differently.
Relationship with Parents. This is a vital indicator. Our parents raise and provide for us; for any normal person, it is natural to reciprocate with care. If this is missing, it is a red flag.

We often naively think: "Yes, they made mistakes in the past, but with me, they will be different." No, they won't. A person of integrity strives to be decent in all areas of life.

Three Major Red Flags

Everyone makes mistakes. Anyone could fail to keep their word once or miss a debt deadline. What matters is not the mistake itself, but the reaction to it. An honest person, unable to repay a debt, stays in touch, explains the situation, and tries to renegotiate. A dishonest person disappears or attacks in response.

I look for three specific red flags:

Casual Abandonment of Obligations. The person simply ignores agreements without attempting to renegotiate terms.
Contempt for the Weak. If someone uses another’s dependency or lower status to humiliate them, it is a danger signal.
Chaos in Personal Relationships. If someone changes partners like gloves, abandons them, or fails to care for their current or former family, it signals inconsistency and irresponsibility.

The Line Between Caution and Paranoia

Where is the boundary between a sensible check and paranoia that prevents building relationships? It depends on the goal.

If it is a business partnership or a close personal relationship intended for the long term, the requirements should be at their highest. If it is just a partner for a game of paddle tennis, the bar is lower. But even then, I would take note if the person fails to meet obligations or has dangerous addictions.

Honest People Have Nothing to Hide

There is a fear that gathering data on a partner or employee undermines trust. I believe that honest people have nothing to hide. If a person hasn't committed serious misconduct, they share information calmly.

If, in response to a request for references, you hear: "The company closed, everyone moved away, they all died, there are no contacts," it is laughable. The same applies to partnerships: if a person is ready to connect you with former partners, it’s a good sign. If they say: "We ended on bad terms, they won't say anything good," why do you think it will be different with you?

In the end, the ability to choose the right people is fundamental, but to build a truly massive enterprise, this skill alone is not enough. Once reliable people are by your side, you must understand how to build them into an effective structure. To help you master this, I invite you to my masterclass, "How to Strengthen the Team, Solidify the Business Foundation, and Reach a New Level."

Register via the link: https://my.bbooster.online/masterclass_smb?utm_source=d6&utm_medium=seo&utm_campaign=visotsky_blog&utm_content=novosti_obayanie_protiv_factov_20260323&utm_term=masterclass_smb